First Aired: November 5, 2006
Plot: A US Army recruiter visits Chris’ school, giving a picture of army life consisting of women in bikinis, money, and Oscar awards (with the disclaimer, “Your experience may differ”). Chris is impressed, and tells his parents he wants to join. They are opposed to the idea, and decide to find another activity to distract him.
Peter notices a metal band practicing at the school, and introduces Chris. They doubt Chris can sing, but are impressed by his scream when Peter drops a piano on Chris’ foot. The band, Splash Log, is a hit with Chris singing “Evil, Evil Monkey” at a school dance, but the noise and antisocial attitude Chris picks up bothers Lois and Peter who both think it’s much worse than when Peter tried to cover up his farts by coughing during a PTA meeting. They notice he’s a fan of Marilyn Manson, so they confront Manson at the Grammy Awards. He goes back to the house to talk to Chris. Manson encourages Chris to respect his parents and be a responsible citizen. Manson suggests that Peter and Chris share an activity like fishing.
Meanwhile, Brian is outraged by the army’s distortions, and, along with Stewie, goes to the recruiting station to complain. However, Stewie is impressed by the guns and enlists himself and Brian. Brian does poorly at boot camp and plans to desert, but Stewie encourages him to stay. They pass basic training and are deployed to Iraq, but attempt to get discharged. Fortunately for them, democracy abruptly kicks in exactly as George W. Bush predicted, allowing them to go home.