First Aired: January 8, 2006
Plot: Brian is nearly killed when Peter hits him with the car (Peter’s comment immediately afterward: “Did I hit that deaf kid again?”). He recovers but he’s depressed by the uncertainty of life and death. He meets Frank Sinatra, Jr. and is inspired by his live-for-today lifestyle. Brian starts singing with Frank Sinatra Jr. on a regular basis. Until one night Brian must watch Stewie, so tells him to wait back-stage. Stewie with nothing to do, decides to join Brian on stage by telling jokes and singing. Stewie joins with Sinatra to form a new Rat Pack. Brian plays the Dean Martin role too well, and ends up coming home too late and losing Stewie. Stewie finds his way home after a hungry deer chews his ear off. Angered, Brian orders Peter to stay out of his life and bites him on the arm. Soon Brian is drinking in the gutter. Stewie lifts his spirits by telling him that someone (Stewie) does care about him. They finish one more number before Mia Farrow (who Peter believes is Frank Sinatra Jr.’s mother) breaks up the act.
Meanwhile, Sarah, a girl in Meg’s science class, invites Meg to her after-school club. Thrilled at being included, Meg agrees but discovers the club is the Lesbian Alliance. She joins anyway and pretends to be a lesbian because they treat her as a friend. Lois confronts Meg about this, but Meg actually tries unsuccessfully to be a lesbian. She finally confesses to Sarah that she just isn’t gay, ruining Quagmire’s attempts to secretly videotape them having sex.