|Season 1, Episode 9|
|Air date||April 18, 2000|
Death Is a Bitch
Chris paints a picture that becomes discovered by an artist and goes world famous, as a piece of fine art.
For his birthday, a blindfolded Peter drives the family to “Bob’s Funland and Putt Putt Golf.” The attraction’s owner, Bob Funland, throws the group out after they cause repeated trouble for other customers. Peter grows depressed over his lack of accomplishments; he remembers Bob Funland as a loser from high school, and even his own obnoxious cousin Kathy Griffin is famous. Chris gives Peter an astonishingly good painting as a present, but Peter simply uses it to cover a hole in the window of his car. An art dealer named Antonio Monatti buys the painting for $5000 and urges Peter to bring Chris to New York City, where he could become a famous artist. Under the guise of nurturing his son’s natural talent, Peter puts Chris completely in Monatti’s hands while the rest of the family tour the city, dazzled by the big-town sights. Monatti gives Chris a total makeover, dying his hair green, dressing him in fashionable clothes, renaming him “Christobel,” and introducing him to a two-dimensional Kate Moss (implying that Kate moss is so thin, when she turns to the side, she disappears). He tells Chris that he can never see his uncultured father again. When Chris reluctantly complies, Peter disowns him and focuses on Meg’s talent for bird calls.
Lois tricks Peter into attending the premiere of Chris’ artwork by telling him that strippers would be distributing free tacos. After a grandiose unveiling, “Christobel’s” masterpiece turns out to be a collection of portraits of Peter in a style reminiscent of that of Andy Warhol. Monatti and the “art crowd” immediately detest the new work and reject Chris as a poseur. As the family prepare to return to Quahog, “heterosexual fashion designer” Calvin Klein spots Stewie and immediately casts him as “the face” for his new line of designer diapers.